Spring Training is near!!!

Well I think picking up all those cans along Highway 99 is going to pay off. Assuming I don't get hit with an unforseen expense or can avoid karaoke binge-drinking night for about a month, I might have scraped enough greenbacks to make it to Arizona for spring training. It's been a good 9 years since the last time but this time might be a little different. I'm just hoping the Giants can look competitive! Save some face. Granted, its only spring training but its a little different this year being as how, well, we're gonna pretty much suck all year. I say draw from the Bill Bilicheck School of Scoring and blow as many teams out as possible. Leave the starters in. Use the bullpen to set up.......well, make the starters go the distance. Brush back Rony Cedeno, periodic tables be damned, the only elements the Giants should acknowledge is the element of surprise just like good ole' Chuck Norris. Do you think Chuck plays for fun? Chuck is able to cash any check his body writes and the Giants should do the same this coming spring. I want to be able to sit next to Joe Dumars like I did in Phoenix one year and wave my finger in his face. "How bout THOSE bad boys Joe?" "How does that taste Joe?". Joe was actually pretty nice. He tried to ignore me and did a pretty good job. Which reminds me of a story of how I scared the bejeezus out of Kristy Yamaguchi one day as she was waiting for her ride in S.F. The details are a little fuzzy but as I remember I was just trying to say hello and she almost fell into the street off the curb as she was backing away. Again, binge drinking has been my achilles heel. BTW, is there a Hooters in S.F. or was I in a tranny bar? Well, in any case the Giants need to get it together. I'm gonna be expecting to see Rowand diving and Durham stealing and if a hammy gets pulled, then stick some icy hot on em and throw um back out there. Actually, I'm sure I'll be to drunk to realize what the hell's going on. I need to get some help.